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Editorials

Cheeky Mama: Say it with me – it's only hair

Oops, it happened again – although this time, it was not on my watch.

Last Sunday, as I was jogging home, my husband and daughter were driving past me to go grocery shopping. He stopped the car to say hello. I tried to give Hannah Jo a huggie, but she said I was too sweaty and gross. 

It was a quick encounter with little face time. Didn’t think anything of it.

Guzzling water, I let the pups out to go potty. The sweat was dripping, so I headed to the shower. Walking over to the stairs, I noticed some hair on the ground. Now, it wasn’t the regular black lab hair. It was blonde. 

At first, I was perplexed. Then I thought it must have come from Hannah Jo’s dolly. I checked each doll, even the ones with various colors of hair. 

There was no evidence of scissors being used.

My heart started to beat faster as I saw more and more clippings of hair. I started picking them up. I opened the garbage can. There was a chunk of blonde hair right on top of the trash. Being the gross person I am, I smelled the hair. It smelled like Hannah Jo’s detangler.

Frantic, I called Bobby. After I explained my horror, he told me there were no noticeable cuts in our daughter’s hair. Either he’s going senile, or he just didn’t want to deal with it over the phone.

Anxiously, I waited for them to come back.  

As soon as they walked in the door, Hannah Jo was ordered to sit on the ottoman. Her very long hair is absolutely the perfect color blonde and gorgeous. Brushing through her hair, I was hoping and praying the damage wasn’t too severe.

Right away, I saw about 4 inches of hair gone from the temple area of her head.  

Holy moly, it had happened again! 

Although this time, it was worse, and not while I was watching her.  

Daddy was supposed to be watching her. What in the world happened?

Apparently, he dozed off on the couch. During this time, she decided to play arts and crafts. Midway through, she decided to cut the troll’s blue hair. Then she thought it would be a great idea to cut her own.  

Daddy understood the tragic event that occurred and seemed remorseful. 

However, he brought me back to reality. It’s only hair, and it will grow back.  

In the 1980s, the mullet was a cool style. However, I think my 3-year-old, Goldilocks, is bringing it back!

• Becca Hirst is a proud DeKalb resident who writes about her life as a working mother. She hopes to bring more enjoyment to and less shaming and judging of herself and other mothers. Reach her at cheekymamadekalb@gmail.com.

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